I do a considerable amount of medication consultation, and one of the most often asked questions in these sessions is how to go about finding a therapist. Although there are numerous pursuable paths toward locating a psychotherapist or counselor, the more important issue is “goodness of fit,” simply, is this someone you can work with.

finding_a_therapistThe search can begin by just merely asking around. Start by asking friends or work colleagues if they’ve ever worked with a counselor; go online and consult directories of licensed social workers, professional counselors or psychologists; ask your primary care physician to direct you to someone, as their networks are typically very widespread. Then after accumulating a few names, pare down the list to three or four possibilities. Now comes the harder part – is this the right therapist for you and your circumstances? Here’s how to begin:

  1. Response to your phone call. After placing your call, how long did it take to obtain a response? Did you even get a response? There’s no reason nowadays any therapist worth seeing can’t return your call within 24 hours at the latest, barring an unforeseen circumstance. None. Technology abounds and we’re all connected one way or another these days. And don’t settle for speaking with a receptionist, you want to connect with the person with whom you’ll be working.
  2. Enthusiasm and energy. Upon responding to your call for services, does the therapist sound enthusiastic and energetic about helping you? If not, you may very well get the same once treatment starts, so beware.
  3. Improving your position. Most psychotherapists will inquire about your presenting problem(s) via the initial phone contact, if not offer some brief details. Then ask if your issues are within the scope of their work and what type of treatment models they employ. Does the explanation make sense? Don’t expect much at this juncture; just obtain an overview of how the work will proceed. And keep in mind that as well trained and experienced as a psychotherapist may be there are areas and concerns with which they may not be proficient, so ask.

So after taking these first 3 steps into account, you’ve decided on someone and have scheduled the first appointment…now

  1. Is the therapist on time? If you’re called in within 15 minutes of the scheduled appointment time, this is reasonable. Beyond that, there’s an organizational problem – scheduling too tightly, or possibly inexperience with managing time with clients. If this pattern continues, do discuss it with the practitioner. Your time is just as valuable.
  2. Office setting. Are you comfortable in the office environment? Are there objects of comfort on display that assist in setting the mood and tone for your work together? If not, ask yourself how unsettling this is for you.
  3. Interruptions, distractions, poor attention. How focused is the therapist on you and why you’re seeking help? Is the professional making eye contact? Is he or she employing active listening skills? What about interruptions, computer or cell phone distractions, poor attention or just staring off into space, so to speak? Such complaints are common, so know this: if this is happening at the initial appointment, to some extent at least, it will likely happen again.
  4. Is the therapist just listening or actively engaging? This is simple: if the counselor is actively engaging, you’ll notice a “give, take and respond” process. If not, you’ll be giving and the therapist may or may not be receiving the information, but response will be limited or all but non-existent. What are you comfortable with?
  5. Personality clashes, style differences, view of the world. Is the therapist blunt, brash and direct, or passive, reserved and timid? What style works best for you? This is important because style and personality differences can definitely impede progress and derail positive outcomes.

And then, after working with the therapist for a few sessions…

  1. Are you merely regurgitating the same issues over and over? If so, the therapy has lost its direction and either needs to get refocused on the agreed-upon objectives or possibly terminate. It’s often you – the client – who needs to raise this issue.
  2. Are you being sufficiently challenged? Competent therapists urge, push and sometimes even cajole their clients. They have to on occasion to get the client moving, as motivation often waxes and wanes.
  3. Are you getting homework? Therapy sessions aren’t self-contained, they build on one another. So are you being directed to engage in certain interventions pursuant to remedying your problems between sessions? If not, the treatment plan is stagnant.
  4. Are you honestly benefiting from the work, or are sessions just dragging on? If you’re benefiting, you should not only be feeling better but also thinking more positively, have an improved attitude and acting in your best interest. If not, it may be time for the therapy to end as such relationships do run their course.

Utilize these 12 tips and there’s a good chance you’ll enjoy and benefit from a satisfying and productive therapeutic relationship.