Every year I speak at a conference that allocates one block of time to an aspiring speaker. This year when I sat in, Jim was well prepared, enthusiastic and worked the audience to a fault. He made himself available at break time and took every question asked of him, thus his program ran over 15 minutes, cutting into the next speaker’s time. Jim received polite applause at the end.
The conference organizer greeted Jim backstage and thanked him for presenting. Jim responded, “At your convenience, may I see the evaluations? I sure hope they liked me.”
There are several people by whom I want to be liked and even loved. When it comes to business though, the focus should be on getting the client, customer or conference attendee as an example, to respect you and the expertise you’re providing – not like you. Seeking mostly or exclusively to be liked in a business climate consistently yields two outcomes – neither of them positive: 1) if given free rein, the client will extract excessive time and energy from you because no boundaries are in place, and 2) the harder you try to please the client, the less objective and authentic you’ll be because you’re too invested in obtaining approval.
To make a difference in any professional circumstance, never place yourself in a position where you’re subject to being marginalized. It will diminish your stature, the last thing you want when seeking to exert influence with those seeking or partaking of your services.
It’s absolutely true – given an inch and it can quickly turn into a mile.
